Kat’s Blog

So there’s pretty much ZERO good Mexican food here in Taiwan…what’s up with that!?  The only place I know is called ‘Grandma Nitty’s’.  It’s not the *best*, but it will suffice until I go back to America…mmMMm, I love Mexican food!

And on another note, I find it really strange that whenever I mention that I’m from Georgia, Taiwanese people will almost inevitably respond with, “Oh, aren’t there a lot of black people there???”  I’m never quite sure how to respond…

Went biking along the river—

Calm breeze, thoughts to myself.

Back kind of hurts now, though

Think maybe I will run tomorrow.

I hug it everyday  This cute, cuddly fellow came in the mail, along with loving notes, a beautiful scarf and other goodies.  I am so thankful for friends.

It looks like someone’s head is being electrocuted, right?  That’s what I thought, anyway.  Haircuts and perms are a lot cheaper here, as are most other things.  I got my haircut for a grand total of 188 NT, which roughly translates to 5-something USD.  Talk about a good deal!

I mean, I dunno…I’m convinced, aren’t you?

As I sit here typing, I am trying to process the day.  I am exhausted.  I think this may be partially due to the fact that I’m sick.  According to my sources, one of the symptons of sinus infection is fatigue.  In the afternoon, I took care of a little boy, who is not being well taken care of.  The social services people are investigating the situation.  His parents’ neglect is obvious from just one glance, from the bruises on his body, the dark circles around his eyes, the dirt under his nails.  He is quite the handful: running around, screaming, not listening, unable to sit still.  He’s so cute, though, and I spent the afternoon playing with him.  Afterwards, I went to teach English, and by teaching English, I mean playing games and having fun.  I tell Bible stories and we chit chat a bit as well.  There is English involved, I promise.  It’s a really precious time, and I really need wisdom in how to make good use of the time.

I’ve been meaning to update, but lack of internet access has prevented me from doing so.  I’m sitting here at Starbucks right now, and I realized while I was sitting here typing away at my computer, that this is the very first time that I’ve been able to sit at Starbucks and use my laptop!  The Barnes and Noble Starbucks has pretty much been my second home, but I’ve never had a laptop to use and…I love this feeling!  Haha it feels so relaxing…

Well, I told a friend that I would try to update at least once a week, and since I was absent last week, I have copied a blurb from my journal last week to make up for it:

If I were a light sleeper, I would most certainly not be able to survive here.  I fall asleep to the noise of cars and motorcycles whizzing by, of dogs barking, fighting.  I wake up in the middle of the night, as I am still recovering from jetlag, and the sounds continue to play, reminding me of where I am, of where I’m not. 

At home, I sleep in complete silence, and here in Taiwan, I hear the noises so loudly that I feel as if there were no wall between me and the outside world so foreign to me.  I wake up to clatter that sounds like an earthquake, the banging noise of construction workers tearing down buildings across from mine.  I am unable to forget for a second, through night and day, that I am no longer at home anymore.

I wait in eager anticipation, though, of the day ahead.  I am meeting some of the kids at the park for the first time!  Right now, I want to just be soaking everything in, observing, listening, and asking.  I pray that I will start today with a positive attitude, with an open heart, that my homesickness will not be a hindrance and that God will give me courage to face the day.

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And now for this week…

The weather here changes from day to day.  When I first arrived here, I felt like I could go out with shorts and a t-shirt.  The past few days have been extra cold, but I haven’t been wearing enough, because I didn’t quite catch the change in weather.  So today I was determined to wear warm clothes, and whaddya know, it was freaking hot!  Haha, so I was walking around with a jacket on, PLUS one of those long overcoats, and I didn’t want to have to carry bulky coats around, so I kept them on, regardless of the fact that the temperature outside was *far* from cold.  Go me >.<!

The day before yesterday I took a taxi back to the place I’m staying at.  It was dark and kind of late at night, but it’s not scary because nighttime is when people come out to play.  So I tell him my address and then the driver hits a one way road, where supposedly I have arrived at the destination.  It’s kind of a dark alley, away from all the lights and people.  Well, it looks a little fishy, because I don’t remember living on a one way road, so I ask again, “Are you sure?”  And he replies with, “Yea, just walk down the road a little bit.” 
 
“Okay…” I say, but the skepticism must have been written clearly all over my face, because he then proceeds to offer to walk me down the street to my place.  Needless to say, I have never ever heard of a Taxi driver walking anyone to their door before!!!  Haha but after he insists several times, I stop refusing, and well…I have a hunch that we are not at the right place, but hey, what do I know?  He parks the car along the road and walks me down the alley.  He stops and points at a door, which I am most positive that it is not mine.  So I tell him, and he takes another good look at the address that I had written down, and says, “Oh! This isn’t the right place!  Good thing I walked you to the door!”  Haha if he had left, I would have been royally screwed. 
 
Moral of the story:  Trust your insticts.  Always let your taxi drivers walk you to the door.

…aaand once again, I suck at goodbyes.  The end.

I guess goodbyes are unavoidable.

Thinking back on all the times I’ve had to leave somewhere, leave people close to me, I’m realizing a pretty consistent, now predictable trend.  This pattern consists of a semi-awkward “goodbye”, inevitably followed by a painfully heavy, sinking feeling inside, most likely due to the fact that I almost never am able to say what I really feel.  When the moment comes, I freeze.  At risk of appearing to be a complete psychopath, I put full concentration and all effort to keeping everything bundled tightly inside until I have successfully mumbled a few parting words (afterwards, never having the slightest recollection of what I said) and am finally safe to be alone in my own swirl of thoughts and feelings, at which point the departure becomes simply unbearable. That’s when the crying begins.

I’m not going to lie; it’s pretty extreme, and quite frankly, embarrassing, which is precisely why I make such great effort not to let others see.  Oh and sometimes, it’s not the sniffling kind of crying either; it’s a seemingly endless stream of tears down my face, the type in which if I try to hold it in, I start hyperventilating, my body goes numb.  I promise I’m no crybaby, and I rarely cry, especially not in front of others. Granted, at times, I’ve failed to hold in the surge of craziness until I’m by myself (case in point: Angela leaving for med school), but most of the time it works.  I’ll provide a couple examples:

When I first began my college adventure, my best friends from high school came to say goodbye to me. We were all starting new chapters in our lives, attending different colleges. As fate would have it, I was scheduled to meet a couple of people for a Wal-Mart run immediately after my high school friends. So as soon as we said our farewells, I rushed off to meet my fellow Techies (none of whom I knew very well at the time). Unfortunately, that left zero time for me to cry in my little corner, and the tears started spilling as I got in the car. Naturally, quizzical, concerned faces peered back at me, despite my best attempts to assure them that “it was nothing”.

When I went on my first short-term missions trip, I became so attached to the people in Taiwan—the kids that I met, the Taiwanese team members, my relatives who were so good to me—that on the plane, I cried and cried until I was too tired, subsequently passing out the entire thirteen hour flight back to America. You can imagine my surprise when I woke up and heard the announcement that we had only thirty minutes until landing. I was so shocked, my jaw literally dropped.

There are many more instances, but I’ll stop here before I sound like a complete stupid idiot…oh wait…too late, huh?